Chiefs Front Office Issues Travis Kelce an Ultimatum: Dump Taylor Swift or Go Somewhere Else

The Kansas City Chiefs don’t talk about it much, but the organization’s front office and ownership despises Taylor Swift.

“They just want her gone from the spotlight,” said team spokesman Joe Barron, “She comes to the games and half the crowd spends the game turning their heads to see if she’s gonna do something or they’re focused on the big screen shouting ‘Taylor, Taylor.’ It’s bad for football.”

A recent survey of the crowd found that rather than the 92 percent Chiefs fans to 8 percent opponents, they now regularly see 8 percent opponents and a 50-50 split between Chiefs fans and Swifties.

“They’ve started paying Eras Tour prices for their tickets,” said Barron, “So now the most popular jersey in the crowd is ‘Swift’ with the number 88. We’re not sure if it’s significant for some other reason than the natural inclination to believe she’s a Nazi.”

ALLOD Sports Correspondelatorist Tara Newhole took a deep dive into the issue and found it to be slightly exaggerated.

“Ever see the Jesus scene in The Stewie Griffin Movie? It’s kinda like that,” said Newhole, “When I heard Al Michaels got fired for disrespecting her I had to see for myself. It turns out he’s just a dick, the crowd couldn’t care less who’s sitting in the VIP boxes, and the cameras hit Taylor about as much as they should, considering she’s literally the most popular human being on the planet.”

Unfortunately, Tara turned out to be a Swifty so we’re not certain how accurate her rep[orting is on this one, patriots. We’ll keep you updated on this developing Story. God Bless America.

Related Posts

Vanna White bids an emotional farewell to Pat Sajak ahead of his final show

Vanna White delivered a heartfelt message to her “brother” Pat Sajak on the eve of his final episode of Wheel of Fortune. The pre-taped messaged aired during…

Unusual device with an unusual shape and a deep significance

The Vintage Folding Steamer: A Timeless Kitchen Companion In the world of kitchen gadgets, few items have remained as enduringly popular as the vintage folding steamer. This…

“I Found These At My Grandma’s House And Have No Idea What They Are”

Wooden clothespins have a long history, dating back to the 19th century when laundry was labor-intensive and clothes had to be hung out to dry. Initially made…

She Was The Love Of My Life At Age 74 Sam Elliot Confirm Rumors Of Decades

In a revelation that has stunned fans and admirers alike, Hollywood icon Sam Elliott has confirmed long-standing rumors of a clandestine love affair spanning decades. At the…

A Missing Little Girl Who Was Featured On “Unsolved Mysteries” Has Finally Been Found

Missing Teen from “Unsolved Mysteries” Found Safe After Four Years Kayla Unbehaun, a teenager who had been missing since 2017 and was prominently featured on Netflix’s “Unsolved…

Тhis Girl Wаs Тrаdеd tо аn Оldеr Mаn fоr Mоnеy аs а Сhild — Nоw Shе’s а Fаmоus Асtrеss whо Mаnаgеd tо Rесоnсilе with Неr 3 Dаughtеrs

Growing up, this future celebrity didn’t have an easy childhood, as it was marked by a mother who constantly drank and even traded her for a few…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *